What is complex trauma: “traumatic stressors that are interpersonal, that are premeditated, planned, and caused by other humans, such as violation and/or exploitation of another person.” Dr. L Courtoise

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Dr. Courtois defines complex betrayal trauma as: “multiple and repeated experiences of interpersonal trauma.”

 

So complex partner betrayal trauma is both relational and repeated. It contains an element of betrayal by a trusted person, and it happens more than once. Often, it is ongoing, a chronic situation that lasts for months or even years.

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Dr. Michele Mays says:  Complex partner betrayal trauma is the overlapping of three types of traumatic impact experienced by betrayed partners that occur simultaneously and influence and exacerbate each other. These three types of trauma—attachment trauma, emotional and psychological trauma, and sexual trauma—weave together, creating an overlapping, intertwined kaleidoscope of betrayal that often touches the nerve center of all three experiences concurrently.

 

• Does Your sense of security and connection  feel destroyed?

• Do you  feel torn in two between both love and loathing for the person who betrayed you. 

• Does you feel torn in two between hatred and love for your partner? 

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There is a word that describes your dilemma.   The word is :  attachment.

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You hate and love the same person simultaneously  and it hurts.  

 

You can heal from this double bind and love and live freely again.

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